THE FIRST STEP


When you are just getting started with something, or have to do something unpleasant it can feel like you are trying to move a brick wall. You may be ready to end a bad relationship, start a new one or begin healing from one that just ended.   Sometimes that wall will just be a styrofoam facade that can easily be pushed down. These are the walls that you sit back and wonder, "why did I take so long to try moving passed this wall!"   Other times you will approach a wall and it will literally be a wall. Those are the times you just have to take a deep breathe and choose one of two options... 1) If it is a delicate wall that needs to be preserved you will need to chip at it one brick at a time until there is enough space to get through.   2) Blow that bad boy to pieces with some dy-no-mite!  Get it out of your way and don't look back! If you're having a difficult time getting started try this... tell yourself you will take one baby step. I'm not talking about massive action. This is the time to do something very small so it feels almost dumb to say you can't move forward.   Examples for ending a relationship:
  • Write a list of 3 reasons to stay in your relationship and 3 reasons to leave your relationship. If 3 seems too much, scale back to 1 reason to stay, 1 reason to go.
  • Take 15 minutes to look up apartments in your area to prepare yourself to move if need be.
  • Open up to one friend about your thoughts of leaving
Examples for healing from a broken relationship:
  • Make a list of 3 people you can call when you feel lonely or sad (not booty calls - delete those numbers)
  • Give yourself 10 minutes to look up a few books on healing from break-ups. If the mood strikes you, order it!
  • Get 5 feel good items to have on hand (e.g. cookie dough, chocolate, happy movies) or plan 2 actions (e.g. call mom, take myself on a date, go to friends house) you can do so you'll be prepared when saddness hits.
Examples for starting a new relationship:
  • Require yourself to get out of the house once a week - not counting work, grocery shopping, or getting take out. Go somewhere for at least 20 minutes to get around new people.
  • Look up dating sites for 15 minutes and see if any of them spark your interest
  • Call two friends and suggest a girls night out.

The greatest love affair started with hello The greatest love song started with a note And the Mona Lisa started with a stroke Maybe me and you could be one of those The greatest idea started with a thought If I think hard enough I can win your heart Cause the greatest love story that was ever told Could be me and you You just never know

- The Greatest by Scene 23

Now it's your turn! Leave a comment with ONE baby step you can take today to get you moving forward?
 

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